A week ago Sunday, my dad had finally had enough of his neck pain, so he went to the Urgent Care place we always go to if we need it. They took an x-ray and found that his arthritis had returned...but they also found a questionable mass in his lungs. So they went to get a cat-scan to see if it was cancer or pneumonia. It ended up being a lump, presumably cancerous. I thought we would find out today what it was, but not quite yet. This week they will do some bronchialslidfaslkdjflas something or other test to see if they can determine what it is, then they'll biopsy it.
This whole situation makes you love someone in a different way. I have always been close with my parents, but it's different now. I don't know. I just want this all to be over with so I can know a little more what to expect.
Prayers are definitely welcome!
"you can fly, I will never die. you can do anything you want to if you try.
I am a robot, and you're an alien. I've been lying to you.
But you believed it. Yeah you believed it.
I've been listening A LOT to the new Brighten album. As of now, it's only available at shows (they just finished up with "Cute Is What We Aim For" and will most likely be hitting the road in May with "Hawthorne Heights") and I guarantee you, it's worth the price of admission.
That quote above, at the beginning of the post, speaks loudly the pleasure of deception. The acceptance of it. The normalcy that deception is to most people. People lie to us, people deceive us. And we believe it. We glady believe it because you tell us what we want to hear. All we want is to believe, to believe is something greater. For me, greater is God. It's music. It's photography. It's friendships and it's love. I don't know what love is. I am clueless when it comes to photography. Music is so subjective. and friendships are fake. I know who God is, but do I let Him know me?
I have a negative outlook on life because I have never been given reason to see things positively. Actually, I have. But I am an artist and small speedbumps get me down. On the whole, things are great. I just allow my mind to beat myself up quicly, over little things. Anybody relate to that?
if you could make the oceans, and live above the skies.
wake the sun for morning, and light the moon at night...
then why oh, why can't I?
then why oh, why can't I?
This photo was taken quite a while ago. My friend Tracy Johnson (www.myspace.com/tracyjohnson) asked me to take promotional shots for her. So naturally I said yes. When she saw them, she wasn't a huge fan, and hasn't used any of them. I still love her. I didn't post them at her request, but I haven't seen her in a while so here they are. I own the rights anyways.
Last night, one of her songs (co-written by the singer in my band) was played on Mtv's "The Real World: Denver" and so I am posting this photo because I am proud of her!
I am getting a new external hard drive in a couple days, so I can start posting photos again. Photos with stories. Don't forget about me, bookmark this place and come back often. Thanks Friends!
I know 4 out of the 5 of those are objects you can buy. I consider my family as part of the friends group. I love my family.
I'm not a very material person. I mean, I am because I enjoy buying things that are awesome (such as cameras, computers, instruments), but I enjoy moments in life, experiences, and people far more than anything you could buy at a store.
With my instruments, I've had the chance to have some amazing experiences. I've traveled to Germany/Switzerland/France because of music. I've played in front of thousands of people in one night. And soon I will be going to Japan to play music. I've gotten to record with amazing artists, I've gotten to learn more about myself by teaching myself an instrument. I've had some great times, and I've allowed myself to look deeper while holding an instrument.
With my camera I've been able to meet and photograph some amazing bands. I've been able to stretch myself by doing portraits, weddings, parties, and other things I would have never imagined attending or trying. I've learned the value of a dollar, and when I want to buy something for my camera, I know it's important to save about two thousand of those valuable dollars. And because of photography, I have now become a "Professional Photographer" for my job. It's full time, and I get to work with kids and love people in a way I could have never imagined.
With my computer, I have become a ".com" and have people from all over the world reading useless ramblings of a dumb guy in San Diego, California.
Because of money, I have been able to buy happiness. DO NOT, for a moment, think that money can buy happiness. Money can be the root of all evil. You just have to use what you have, in a positive way. Years ago, I decided that I was going to live my life in a way that made me happy. I think that if you have a job that you're not happy with, you need to do something to change it. I have had jobs I enjoy, but I am constantly changing in the area of what I enjoy. I have come to a place where I love what I do. My free time is filled with photography, or music, or traveling, or friendships. Not to pull a Dr. Phil on you, but when you click out of this page and go elsewhere on the net, don't forget this. Don't forget that YOU are responsible for yourself. You have the power to make yourself happy. Just look at life a little differently.
"In this life you're the flower and the thorn... -jon foreman
Anyways, my point being this:
Sherwood is releasing a new album on March 13th, it is called "A Different Light" and it is worth the money. If you head over to myspace.com/sherwood and look around, you can get the album for under $10, or the album AND a shirt for $16. Please do youself a favor and get this album, it is very solid from start to finish.
The least you can do is go to their myspace and listen to a few songs. Then come back here and tell me what you think.
Not everything is black and white.
Speaking of travel. I just found out this week that my bands record label in Japan is bring us out to Tokyo in May. We're going to be opening for our friends in Waking Ashland for at least 3 shows. I love Waking Ashland, and they are from right here where I live, so it will be great to travel across the world with them. I am excited to see Japan, and know what the culture is like. My friend Jordan (from As I Lay Dying) has told me that Japan has the best fans in the world, and I look forward to finding out for myself. You can expect pictures, for sure!!!
I love music, I love photography, I love sleeping, I love God, and I love my life. I am thankful for ALL of the awesome things I get to do.
"Concert this Friday!"
That's an easy one. Maybe political statements, or maybe religious statements.
"Jesus Loves You"
Whatever has gone on this post, placed there by a person, and held tightly by staples, I hope it was read. I hope someone saw the message, and acknowledged it. Either by reading, or ripping the paper off, or sticking gum to it. I hope this post has been well loved. Actually, as I was walking down this street, I saw a woman walking with a stack of papers and a stapler. She stopped at the post before this, and left her message. And to be honest, I am everything I don't want to be. I didn't read her message. I just thought about what I would staple to a post.
What would you staple to a post? If you were on a busy street with a stack of papers and a stapler, what would your papers say?